terrible dad jokes reddit

61 Awkwardly Terrible Dad Jokes From Reddit

Dad jokes are typically funny but spend some time on Reddit and you will quickly find some terrible Dad jokes.

While digging deep on Reddit to find the best Dad jokes from Reddit, some of the most terrible Dad jokes were uncovered. Here is a list of 61 terrible Dad jokes from Reddit.

Terrible Dad Jokes Reddit

1. Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth.

Then it’s a soap opera

2. I saw a magical tractor yesterday.

It turned into a field

3. I went on a walk last night with this really attractive girl.

Then she noticed me

4. I once wrote a song about a Tortilla.

It’s more of a wrap

5. I bought a new dog and his name is Minton.

But he keeps eating my shuttlecocks. BAD-Minton!

6. I went to the zoo the other week, and there was just one animal. It was one dog alone in a cage.

It was a Shih Tzu

7. Two sheep walk into a BAAAAAAAAAA!

8.  I love telling Dad jokes. 

Sometimes he even laughs

9. To the person that stole my place in the queue.

I’m after you

10. What do you call a line of men waiting to get a haircut?

A Barber-queue

11. I had a summer job cleaning monkey cages at a zoo.

That sht was bananas

12. A witches vehicle goes broom broom.

13. There are two fish in a tank.

And one says to the other “Can you drive this?”

14. Did you know that a Koala bear isn’t a bear?

Apparently it didn’t Koala-fy 

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15. A man goes to the Doctor because he can see into the future.

The Doctor asks, “How long have you been suffering from this condition?”

The man said, “Since Next Monday!”

16. What is an owl’s favorite toy?

A hoo-la hoo-p

17.  What do you call it when Blake Griffin picks his nose?

A pick and roll

18. What is Forrest Gump’s password?

1forrest1

19. What noise does a 747 make when it bounces?

Boeing, Boeing, Boeing

20. What do you make with epilectic lettuce?

A seizure salad

21. What did the horse say when he fell down?

“Help, I can’t Giddy-up!” 

22. What kind of dog never barks?

A Hush puppy

23. What do you call someone that never farts in public?

A private tooter

24. What did the mayonnaise say when someone opened the refrigerator door?

“Close it! I’m dressing!”

25. What gets to stay on the corner but travel all around the world?

A stamp

26. What do prostitutes say when you first meet them?

“Idaho”

27. What kind of car does an egg drive?

A yolks-wagen

28. What kind of car does a cow drive?

A beef-mw

29. What do you call a couple who go fishing together?

Annette and Rod

30. England doesn’t have a Kidney bank.

But they have a Liverpool

31. Used to have a job as a helium balloon.

But they let me go

32. Farted on an elevator once.

It was wrong on so many levels

33. I applied for a job as a pair of scissors.

But I didn’t make the cut

34. Did you hear about the block of cheese at the edge of a cliff?

It was ledge-end-dairy

35. Did you hear about the Roman cannibal that ate his ex-wife?

He’s glad-he-ate-her

36. How much does a chimney cost?

Nothing, it’s on the house.

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37. My friend became an archeologist.

Hi life is now in ruins 

38. What do you call a black Labrador at the beach in August?

A hot dog

 39. Not knowing Greek Mythology is my biggest weakness.

It’s my Achilles Horse

40. Did you know that Japanese cannibals don’t cook their food?

They prefer Ramen

41. What’s ET short for?

Because he has tiny legs

42. I was wondering why this frisbee kept looking bigger and bigger.

Then it hit me

43. What do you call an alligator in a vest?

An investi-gator

44. Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house?

Of course, a house can’t jump

45. Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was out standing in his field

46. Why did the orange lose the race?

Because it ran out of juice

47. Somebody threw a can of Coke at me today.

Luckily it didn’t hurt, it was a soft drink

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48. I had a neck brace fitted a few years ago.

Since then, I’ve never looked back.

49. I went to the “World’s Smallest Wind Turbine” exhibition.

Honestly, not a big fan.

50. I thought the washing machine was shrinking my clothes.

Turns out it was the fridge all along

51. I’ve been training racing deer.

Just trying to make a quick buck

52. I love bad puns.

That’s just how eye roll

53. Stop looking for your perfect match.

Use a lighter

54. My Spaniel was just eating a hot dog.

It’s a dog eat dog world out there

55. What did the French Chef give his wife for her birthday?

A hug and a quiche

56. What happened when two pieces of bread met on Tinder?

It was loaf at first sight

57. What do you call it when a group of chimpanzees start a company?

Monkey business

58. What does a mob boss buried in cement become?

A hardened criminal

59. What does garlic do when it gets hot?

It removes its cloves

60. What do you call an overweight psychic?

A four-chin teller

61. Sundays are always a little sad.

But the day before is a sadder day

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