Christmas is a wonderful time of year. And if you are searching for some funny Dad jokes to share with family and friends during the holiday season then have a quick look at this list of 52 hilarious Christmas Dad jokes. These Dad jokes will have everyone laughing and smiling.
1. I took my old car to the mechanic because it was making a terrible noise.
He removed the Mariah Carey Christmas CD and now it’s fine.
2. I just bought my wife a fridge for Christmas.
I can’t wait to see her face light up when she opens it.
3. Why does Santa go down the chimney?
Because it soots him.
4. What says “Oh, Oh, Oh” and wears a big red suit?
Santa walking backwards!
5. Knock Knock.
Who’s there?
Justin.
Justin who?
Justin time to help decorate.
6. Why did Santa Claus plant 3 gardens?
So he could Hoe, Hoe, Hoe!
7. Did you hear about the insect that hates Christmas?
It’s called a Humbug.
8. I got a bunch of Christmas decorations for Christmas and I got really sick.
I got Tinsillitis.
9. What is a dog’s favorite Christmas carol?
Bark the Herald Angel Sing.
10. How come Santa doesn’t like going down the chimney anymore?
Because he’s Claus-trophobic.
11. How does a sheep say Merry Christmas?
Fleece Navidad.
12. What did one reindeer say to the other reindeer?
I don’t know, they both speak English.
13. Santa Claus offered me some chips one time. Do you know what they were?
They’re called Chris Pringles.
14. Where does Santa stay when he’s on vacation?
A Ho Ho Ho-tel.
15. What does a snowman do on the weekends?
Just chill.
16. What did Mrs. Claus say to Santa when she looked up in the sky?
It looks like rain dear.
17. How did the ornament get addicted to Christmas?
He’s been hooked on trees his whole life.
18. Why are Dasher and Dancer always taking coffee breaks?
Because they are Santa’s star bucks!
19. Why is Santa so good at karate?
Because he has a black belt.
20. What kind of music do elves like?
Rap!
21. Where do all of the baby sharks get their Christmas presents from?
From Santa Jaws!
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22. What do you call Santa’s most impolite reindeer?
Rude-olph.
23. Why are Christmas trees so bad at knitting?
Because they always drop their needles.
24. What do you get when Santa goes down a chimney with a fire in it?
Crisp Kringle!
25. Do you know what’s on the top of Santa’s playlist?
Elve-is Presley.
26. What do you sing at a snowman’s birthday party?
“Freeze a jolly good fellow!” “Freeze a jolly good fellow!”
27. What does Santa bring naughty boys and girls on Christmas Eve?
A pack of batteries that say “Toys not included.”
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28. Why was Santa’s little helper feeling depressed?
Because he had low elf-esteem.
29. What is a snowman’s favorite breakfast?
Ice Krispies.
30. What nationality is Santa Claus?
North Poleish!
31. What do you get when you cross Santa and a duck?
A Christmas Quacker.
32. What is red, white and blue during Christmas?
A sad candy cane.
33. Why is it always so cold during Christmas?
Because it’s Decemberrrrrrrrr.
34. Why are mummies such big fans of Christmas?
Because they enjoy wrapping.
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35. What is green, white and red all over?
A sunburnt elf.
36. How does a snowman lose weight?
He waits until the weather gets warmer.
37. What do reindeers hang on their Christmas trees?
Horn-aments!
38. What’s a mathematician’s favorite Christmas snack?
A mince pi.
39. What’s a hairdresser’s favorite Christmas song?
Oh comb all ye faithful.
40. Why did Santa get a parking ticket?
Because he parked in the ‘snow parking’ zone.
41. Why did the man bring toilet paper to the Christmas party?
Because he was a party popper!
42. When you get cold, where in your house should you go to get warm?
The corner. They’re usually 90 degrees.
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43. What comes at the end of Christmas Day?
The letter Y.
44. What part of the Christmas turkey does Darth Vader like?
The Dark Side!
45. What is every parent’s favorite Christmas carol?
Silent Night.
46. Did you hear Santa’s new joke?
It will sleigh you!
47. What is the absolute best Christmas present?
A broken drum. You just can’t beat it!
48. How much did Santa pay for his sleigh?
Nothing, because it was on the house!
49. What’s it called when a Turkey goes for a run?
Fast Food!
50. What do you call an elf wearing earmuffs?
Anything! He can’t hear you!
51. What does the Grinch do with a baseball bat?
Hits a gnome and runs!
52. Why does everybody like Frosty The Snowman?
It’s because he is so cool!
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