If you have been searching for a way to tell a Dad joke of the day, now you can. By finding this article, you can now tell a Dad joke of the day for 60 days in a row. Dad jokes can be shared among family and friends or at parties, functions, special occasions, and your workplace. Here are 60 Dad jokes that you can tell everyday for the next two months.
1. What do you get if you cross an angry sheep with a moody cow?
An animal that’s in a baaaaaaaad mooooooood.
2. What do you get from a pampered cow?
Spoiled milk!
3. What kind of egg did the evil chicken lay?
A deviled egg!
4. What is it called when Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up?
Alloys.
5. After dinner, my mom asked if I could clear the table.
I needed a running start, but I made it!
6. I found a wooden shoe in my toilet today.
It was clogged.
7. Why are Canadian students so smart?
They get a lot of Ehs!
8. What do you call a mac ‘n’ cheese that gets all up in your face?
Too close for comfort food!
9. If an English teacher is convicted of a crime and doesn’t complete the sentence, is that a fragment?
10. What’s the difference between a duck and George Washington?
One has a bill on his face, and the other has his face on a bill.
11. Did you hear about the power outlet that got into a fight with a power cord?
He thought he could socket to him.
12. I’m addicted to collecting vintage Beatles albums.
I need Help!
13. What do you call 26 letters that went for a swim?
Alphawetical.
14. What’s the name of a very polite European body of water?
Merci.
15. What’s another name for an iPhone power cord?
Apple Juice!
16. Why were the utensils stuck together?
They were spooning.
17. My son asked me to put his shoes on, but I don’t think they’ll fit me.
18. Why couldn’t the sesame see get off the hill?
It was on a roll!
19. Why do dads feel the need to tell such bad jokes?
They just want to help you become a groan up!
20. What do you call a toothless bear?
A gummy bear!
21. Why did the PowerPoint presentation cross the road?
To get to the other slide!
22. Where did you learn about ice cream?
Sundae school.
23. How do trees access the internet?
They log in.
24. I used to work for an origami company.
Then it folded.
25. Why did the pirate walk the plank?
His dog was back on land.
26. Why did Cinderella leave the basketball team?
She ran away from the ball.
27. How well did I hang up that picture?
I nailed it!
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28. What do you call it when Batman skips church?
Christian Bale.
29. Can one bird make a pun?
No, but toucan.
30. My hotel tried to charge me 10 dollars extra for air conditioning.
Not cool!
31. Why was the horse so happy?
Because he lived in a stable environment.
32. What do you call a kangaroo’s lazy joey?
A pouch potato.
33. What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a tricycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle?
Attire!
34. How does Reese eat cereal?
Witherspoon.
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35. When is a door not a door?
When it’s ajar.
36. How do you get a country girl’s attention?
A tractor.
37. I have a great joke about nepotism, but I’ll only tell it to my kids.
38. The rotation of Earth really makes my day.
39. Does anyone need an ark?
I Noah guy.
40. What would the Terminator be called in his retirement?
The Exterminator.
41. Why did the girl keep buying so many books?
Because she had no shelf control!
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42. The recipe said, “Set the oven to 180 degrees.”
But now I can’t open it because the door faces the wall.
43. Why can’t you trust anything balloons say?
They’re full of hot air!
44. What did the elephant want for his birthday?
A trunk full of presents!
45. I got a new pair of gloves today, but they’re both left-handed.
On the one hand, it’s great. But on the other hand, it’s just not right.
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46. It’s hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally.
47. Do mascara and lipstick ever argue?
Sure, but then they makeup.
48. Where do sharks go on vacation?
Finland!
49. Why does putting a car in reverse make you nostalgic?
Because, it takes you back.
50. What do you call the boss at Old McDonald’s Farm?
The CIEIO!
51. Which bees are the smartest?
Spelling bees!
52. What is heavy forward but not backward?
A ton!
53. I signed up for a marathon, but how will I know if it’s the real deal or just a run-through?
54. What do you call a sleeping bull?
A bull-dozer!
55. I’m very pleased with my new fridge magnet.
So far, I’ve got 12 fridges!
56. Why do dogs tend to run in circles?
Because it’s really hard to run in squares.
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57. People are usually shocked that I have a Police record.
But I love their greatest hits!
58. What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?
59. Why does a clock break when it gets hungry?
It goes back four seconds!
60. What does a karate master get rewarded with while driving?
A seat belt!
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